Mr. F, originally from the Littoral Cameroon region. Banen ethnicity. 40 years old. Lives in Douala, works in road construction. Comes for a second attempt at AMP, suffers from insufficient number and mobility of sperm. First of a sibling of 7. Fate of a very pious monogamous family of Protestant religion. Fifth year of married life without children. After taking decoctions a few times and praying without success, he dedicates himself to AMP; unfortunately, the first one tries not being successful. Mr. F cares more about his wife so his age is approaching the critical threshold for the AMP procedure. He procrastinates about submitting to an AID, a decision that is not easy to make despite desperately wanting a child for his wife. | ||
Theme | Descriptors | Verbatims |
Data related to cultural constraints | Pressure from family and loved ones to continue the lineage | “People are talking behind and at home we are silent, it is much more Madam listening to what we are saying.” Who loves a tree that has no fruit, no one. You are like a flower that adorns the court and dies afterwards, leaving no fruit. We’re still bothering you.” |
Respect for ancestral values, safeguarding the spiritual and social heritage | “But, you also have to leave offspring before you also die one day. You are going to spend on someone’s child no matter how he goes to see his parents and you are going to stay like that.” “It is better to have the child of your blood “someone’s child one always ends up going away.” | |
The practice of spiritual rites and traditional rituals | “... Mom would ask us from time to time to take some potions that she gave us to drink to cleanse the body”; “If my mother knows that I have a problem, she will start to say that we go to the marabouts to do rituals, but if it continues like this, we’ll take a tour of the village to see what’s wrong.” | |
Data related to the secret of the AID | The secrecy’s weight | “No one is aware that we have initiated this procedure.” “No one in the family knows about this; well, that’s the price to pay when you want the child”; “It’s a grief that we do alone. If not with his wife, without shouting out loud. It’s very difficult to live”; “It’s something I’ve always kept a secret, and my wife doesn’t talk about it too.” |
Failure of loyalty to spouse, family and community | “...age is advancing, we have to do PMA...My wife is 37 years old...he advised us not to waste time, that when age advances, the chances of success are reduced, and you see soon, she will be 40 years old”; “It is her that we ask what is wrong, the neighbors, the people of the family, many do not know that I have a problem, we know that she is the culprit, that is why I preferred that we redo the PMA, if it can really work so that we don’t bother her anymore.” “We will all be quiet, as well as my people.” | |
The personal representation of ART/AID | If there were the means, we shouldn’t have started the other the same year without waiting too long; from 2017 to 2019, it’s not easy, we also have to help the family”; it’s really too expensive, there are a lot of people who are in the same situation as me but who cannot do this for lack of means”; “The ADI here at home in Africa, what are you going to tell people. This is for the whites.”; “When you take someone’s semen, whose child is that? Everyone thinks it’s your child, you know the truth, it hurts you even more.” | |
Data related to the shame of the social gaze | The feeling of guilt | “I don’t know why all this is happening to me when everyone around me, my brothers and sisters have children, what have I done to God?” “So that madame is so happy, all that I give her now cannot replace a child.” “It is difficult to hear that a man does not manage to have children, it is a lot more common in women”; “All I want is to give my wife a child.” |
The feeling of loss of self-esteem and the fear of a possible divorce | “... I was made to understand that euhhhhhh, my sperm count is small and that it doesn’t move a lot.”; “Sometimes I wonder if Madame will not leave me one day; the last time she cried so much”; “My in-laws, don’t see me that much”; “I waited for the results but unfortunately it was not positive. No one had the strength to talk to the other home”; “It was very hard, I was disappointed, I was uncomfortable.” | |
The feeling of incompleteness | “No lie to you, I was euhhhhh, I was really disappointed… discouraged, very sick, sad, [piafff],” It’s really, really hard. “That’s why I do everything I can to ensure that we have our child together so that we can finally be as peaceful as other people”; “It’s complicated to live without children.” | |
Data related to mystical-religious practices | The relationship to witchcraft | “She will try to find out if it is not a spell that the wizards have cast on me or if it is not me who sought”, “they will begin to accuse me of being a wizard, or that I have sold my wife’s belly or I sold for myself, to get money; Yes, it is like that.” |
Beliefs in evil spirits and supernatural powers | It is often said that evil spirits can prevent someone from conceiving, “I must end up thinking it’s mystical, because I don’t understand a thing at all. How is it that I am the only child of my mother among so many others to have this problem? What made my semen not work well? I wonder if that’s not mystical.” | |
The ART Process | Failure in the process | “... this is the fifth year now that I can say that I have started looking for the child without success”; “My wife is already 37 years old, he told us that as the age advances the chances of success are reduced, she will soon be 40 years old, it becomes more and more worrying”; “For two years I have been looking for the money to come back and resume, it is not easy.” |
Doubt about the quality of the unborn child via AID | “[tsuip] The other one there hmmm; you can take the blood of a bandit to your family and regret all your life.” | |
Doubt about therapeutic efficacy | “... when we take a lot of oocytes like what we removed from the lady there, there is no risk that it will end and that the next few times we will not find any more? Because of this I’m really afraid. When it is said that they took 10 or 12 oocytes.” “Well maybe, since you never know, you’ll end up going to the traditional healer to really find out what’s wrong”; “We did the exams again. Sometimes I’m afraid of this situation.” |